Chasing everyone else's version of success
What does success mean to you?
Have you really thought about what success means to you?
Are you chasing everyone else's version of success?
Expensive cars, mansions, private jets, and a billion dollars in the bank is how a lot of people define success.
Is that what you really want? If it is, fantastic, work hard to achieve your goals. Put every ounce of energy into what you are doing, and get where you want to be.
Are you putting out massive amounts of energy and focus into goals that are not really yours? Have you become a prisoner of your own life because you've been chasing what everybody else says you should?
The saying money does not buy happiness is certainly true. Plenty of people have tons of money, every material possession they can think of, make it to higher positions in the workplace, but they are still miserable.
If you chase someone else's dreams, you won't be happy if they come true.
When I was younger I was terrible in school. It was not because I wasn't smart, but because the standard school system did not fit how I functioned. The result was terrible grades all the way through college. My grades became so bad in college I was kicked out. I was kicked out of a place I was paying to go to. A place to earn a degree I had no interest in.
Why was I even in college?
Because to gain success, I must go to college, or so I thought.
My brother went to college. Everyone I knew went to college. If you wanted to get a good job and make lots of money, you had to go to college.
Of course, I now know this is not true. Success did not come because I went to college.
All my life, I just wanted to be normal. I wanted to sit in a classroom and focus. I wanted to fit in and fall into a normal job like everyone else I saw.
Normal to me was getting a new car with a payment. I even thought I should take out student loans so I would not have to stress over paying for school or beg my parents for money. I am glad I never did it now. Not doing that, made me feel abnormal. Why?
My father taught me better than to be stuck with a car payment, especially when I did not make much at all. He taught me to work on cars and keep them running.
The pull to be normal was strong, even if I knew better.
Because it is normal for everyone else's goals to become your own.
To add to all that, when I was younger, I had no clue what would really make me happy or what I really wanted.
I did not know what success meant to me. Nobody else around me knew either. They were doing what everybody else around them was doing.
This is normal. What I am saying is nothing earth shattering or new.
It is called keeping up with the Joneses.
You see someone on Facebook doing something, so you need to keep up and do it too. Your neighbor has a new truck, now you need one too.
Is your vehicle bad? Does it function just fine? It may not be perfect, but you feel inferior because someone may barely know got a new vehicle. He must be more successful.
When you really look at it, it may seem ridiculous. It is easy to chase other people's version of success.
This will only lead to burn out, depression, and lack of fulfillment.
Many people think if they stumble upon a huge a amount of money, all their problems will be solved. They can sit on the beach and drink all day.
This alone will not bring happiness. This alone does not bring success. It may make easier. It may relieve stress from debt and bills, but it will not be the end.
There are even shows about this. Someone wins the lottery, and they go on a spending spree trying to find fulfillment. They have gold toilets, a house with 30 bedrooms, 50 cars, and their life is a mess. Many of them even go bankrupt.
What is success then?
If it is not having more than everyone else, then what is it?
Is it getting a promotion?
Is it having a picture perfect family on Facebook?
Is getting to a magical point where you can sip fancy drinks on beach somewhere?
Of course it's not. If you're not careful you will chase all these things without even thinking about it, striving to keep up, but never reaching an end point.
Welcome to the world of fake success. If you've ever worked in a workplace for someone else, you see the carrot of fake success dangling, and everyone seems to chase it.
The world of fake success is so common, it's hard to escape it's allure.
Everyone's goals are the same. Everyone wants what everyone else does. If you don't want what they want, you feel less than. Like you're not normal.
Everyone is looking for a promotion. Is that what they really want? They want to climb the ladder that leads to nowhere, picturing piles of money, no worries, and telling everyone else what to do.
So and so buys an expensive car you see in the parking lot. Without realizing, you want to fit in and think about spending 50,000 dollars on something that will be worth half of that in a few years. To make it worse, your neighbor and 5 other people in your neighborhood have a new car to.
If people are asked about retirement, many say, " I don't know maybe I'll be a greeter at Wal Mart. I'd be so bored not working."
This is a serious problem.
Most people don't have a clue about what their goals are. They do not write them down. It does not even cross their mind.
If you do not decide and plan your own challenges in your life, you will be faced with challenges you didn't sign up for. You will be doing things which you have little passion for and spending massive amounts of your precious energy doing so.
You will feel burnt out, tired, and unhappy, but you will keep going ,hoping it gets better when you make it to the supervisor position. It won't. The lack of energy and passion you feel will be from lack of purpose and true goals.
Before it is too late, we must operate on a higher level with a strategic plan for the future.
In order to do this, it takes effort to get away from the noise, and the people who are chasing fake success. They need to be tuned out, so you can think clearly. You need to find a strong purpose, a why for what you do in your life. Without a purpose or plan, say goodbye to happiness and fulfillment.
To find your version of success, you must have a clear purpose.
Just saying you want to make a lot of money fall flat every time. You must enjoy the process more than you enjoy the outcome.
A hazy version of yourself sitting in middle or upper management will fall flat every time. Will you enjoy the process of getting there? Probably not. You may, but it's not likely.
Do you wanna be a rock star? Will you enjoy the process of getting there? Are you willing to work hard to get your foot in the door at venues, make little to no money at first? Are you willing to work at it for years without even getting a chance to make any decent money? Or do you do it because you LOVE playing music for people. If not, let that stuff go.
In order to find your unique version of success, you need to dig down and find a purpose, a reason you get out of bed excited to start the day. If not, you will be the one hoping to win the lottery, so you can kick back and be content.
If you want to kick back on the beach, what is the process going to be like to get there? Once you are on the beach, you will get bored, or find destructive ways to occupy your brain's need for stimulation.
Since everyone is unique, everyone will have different versions of success. If people are minimalists and don't wish to have a lot of possessions, living with almost nothing will be success. Finding ways to make this happen, sharing their knowledge with other like minded people, will be their version of success. They will feel free.
When someone makes the decision to operate their life with a purpose, it naturally gets them doing something they truly love. If you are doing something you love, you do it even if you are not getting paid. When you get lost in what you are doing, doing something creating intense focus where time seems to fly, they become extraordinary at it. When you are great at something, there is a high chance you can eventually make an income at it.
You can work an everyday job and still do something else that fulfills your purpose. Eventually this could lead to an extra stream of income, or the ability to quit your job entirely.
Think are someone you admire for their massive success. It could be a musician, athlete, author, or any other notable person. What do they have in common?
They enjoy what they do so much, they became great at it. They enjoyed the process of getting to where they are now. It was like they had a calling. They had a purpose.
Take some time in your life to focus on your goals. Forget what everyone else thinks success is. What is you version?
Find something that gives you a purpose, reason to get your day going. A purpose so strong, you get lost doing it. This will bring endless energy and focus.
Don't fall into the trap of blindly following everyone else's version of success. Figure out what you want and make it happen.
Is it getting a promotion?
Is it having a picture perfect family on Facebook?
Is getting to a magical point where you can sip fancy drinks on beach somewhere?
Of course it's not. If you're not careful you will chase all these things without even thinking about it, striving to keep up, but never reaching an end point.
Welcome to the world of fake success. If you've ever worked in a workplace for someone else, you see the carrot of fake success dangling, and everyone seems to chase it.
The world of fake success is so common, it's hard to escape it's allure.
Everyone's goals are the same. Everyone wants what everyone else does. If you don't want what they want, you feel less than. Like you're not normal.
Everyone is looking for a promotion. Is that what they really want? They want to climb the ladder that leads to nowhere, picturing piles of money, no worries, and telling everyone else what to do.
So and so buys an expensive car you see in the parking lot. Without realizing, you want to fit in and think about spending 50,000 dollars on something that will be worth half of that in a few years. To make it worse, your neighbor and 5 other people in your neighborhood have a new car to.
If people are asked about retirement, many say, " I don't know maybe I'll be a greeter at Wal Mart. I'd be so bored not working."
This is a serious problem.
Most people don't have a clue about what their goals are. They do not write them down. It does not even cross their mind.
If you do not decide and plan your own challenges in your life, you will be faced with challenges you didn't sign up for. You will be doing things which you have little passion for and spending massive amounts of your precious energy doing so.
You will feel burnt out, tired, and unhappy, but you will keep going ,hoping it gets better when you make it to the supervisor position. It won't. The lack of energy and passion you feel will be from lack of purpose and true goals.
Before it is too late, we must operate on a higher level with a strategic plan for the future.
In order to do this, it takes effort to get away from the noise, and the people who are chasing fake success. They need to be tuned out, so you can think clearly. You need to find a strong purpose, a why for what you do in your life. Without a purpose or plan, say goodbye to happiness and fulfillment.
To find your version of success, you must have a clear purpose.
Just saying you want to make a lot of money fall flat every time. You must enjoy the process more than you enjoy the outcome.
A hazy version of yourself sitting in middle or upper management will fall flat every time. Will you enjoy the process of getting there? Probably not. You may, but it's not likely.
Do you wanna be a rock star? Will you enjoy the process of getting there? Are you willing to work hard to get your foot in the door at venues, make little to no money at first? Are you willing to work at it for years without even getting a chance to make any decent money? Or do you do it because you LOVE playing music for people. If not, let that stuff go.
In order to find your unique version of success, you need to dig down and find a purpose, a reason you get out of bed excited to start the day. If not, you will be the one hoping to win the lottery, so you can kick back and be content.
If you want to kick back on the beach, what is the process going to be like to get there? Once you are on the beach, you will get bored, or find destructive ways to occupy your brain's need for stimulation.
Since everyone is unique, everyone will have different versions of success. If people are minimalists and don't wish to have a lot of possessions, living with almost nothing will be success. Finding ways to make this happen, sharing their knowledge with other like minded people, will be their version of success. They will feel free.
When someone makes the decision to operate their life with a purpose, it naturally gets them doing something they truly love. If you are doing something you love, you do it even if you are not getting paid. When you get lost in what you are doing, doing something creating intense focus where time seems to fly, they become extraordinary at it. When you are great at something, there is a high chance you can eventually make an income at it.
You can work an everyday job and still do something else that fulfills your purpose. Eventually this could lead to an extra stream of income, or the ability to quit your job entirely.
Think are someone you admire for their massive success. It could be a musician, athlete, author, or any other notable person. What do they have in common?
They enjoy what they do so much, they became great at it. They enjoyed the process of getting to where they are now. It was like they had a calling. They had a purpose.
Take some time in your life to focus on your goals. Forget what everyone else thinks success is. What is you version?
Find something that gives you a purpose, reason to get your day going. A purpose so strong, you get lost doing it. This will bring endless energy and focus.
Don't fall into the trap of blindly following everyone else's version of success. Figure out what you want and make it happen.
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